Valentines day Bravery

So I got to thinking last night about all the misconceptions surronding valentines day. Some people feel it's a greeting card holiday, and is essentially meaningless. Others celebrate with chocolate, which i do love and appreciate but a part of me just felt like there was definately more to it. I also quite like the idea of  celebrating it as a love holiday, it makes sense, but still I felt as though there was missing piece of the puzzle.

Now I know the history of valentines day and have known it for quite a while but for some reason all I ever got out of it was"love". Maybe that's because I was too young to get the true meaning when I first heard the story, or maybe because when you're a kid all you really need is love, so there was no need to find an additional lesson in that story. But these days love isn't always enough. The more you grow up the more you realize that love often needs a companion..popular choices are often trust, and communication, but for Valentines day I think bravery is much more appropriate.



In case you're unfamiliar with the origins of valentines day, I'll give you a quick rundown.
Saint Valentine was somewhat of a defiant roman priest that lived during the 3rd century AD under emperor Claudius the 2nd. Claudius ended up banning marriage because he thought it would distract his soldiers from fighting the war. However, Rebel fatherValaentine was not buying into any of Claudius' foolishness so he continued to secretly marry young couples. Now if that isn't brave I don't know what is! I mean to do something you truly believe in even when you know you run the risk of being executed if you're found out, that takes A)an amazing amount of conviction and B) a steel set of balls.



So yes Valentines day is undoubtedly about love but it's also about bravery and conviction, and being true to yourself no matter the risk. Those are lessons we often overlook, but they're clearly the biggest part of the story.

Now with that being said take a moment to really let that sink in and think about your own truth, your own convictions, and be inspired to have the bravery to live them.
Today make it a point to not only celebrate love, but celebrate the bravery it takes for your heart to accept and give love openly, willingly, and without conditions.. because that in itself makes you absolutely amazing and akin to a warrior.

So I encourage you to go out take a risk, do something brave, say something loving, and feel like the awesome badass that you are.♥

I Surrender

"I surrender". There's something really powerful about those two words. I used to see surrender as giving up but it's not, it's giving in. But its giving in,  in a beautiful way, in a way that gives you a special kind of freedom you didn't know you needed. Letting the genle current of the universe carry you where it may because you know wherever it takes you will be beautiful. Takes a great deal of trust to surrender. Trust in yourself, in the greater good, trust that there are certain things we are destined to live and learn.

I always saw myself as swimming up stream, and try as I might i never really got where I was going. It was hard, exhausting, and frustrating but how else would I get what I wanted? Surrendering anything was far from my mind, I definately had a control issue. Still somehow little by little I started relinquishing control, realized I needed more and wanted more from life than just struggle. So I began letting go of my "wants" because honestly for most of my life I was never 100% sure that I really wanted what I said I wanted. I'd make up my mind to want something and would struggle and fight to get it but deep down I always doubted if it was right. And looking back It almost makes no sense to fight so hard for something you're unsure of.

Surrender offers a freedom and release from all your expectations. It allows things to start to flow naturally and fall into place in the best possible way. You see surrending is an art form. One I admit can be quite challenging to master. But I think we make it far more difficult than it has to be. We fear it like it's going to take something precious away from us. We think that when we decide to surrender and release a certain feeling, person or situation it means we have to forget it ever existed, but thats not how it works. Once you surrender, you still remember, and still feel. And that's fine, that's beautiful because it's what we're meant to do, feel (trust me, you'll look back on it and be glad you didn't go numb).

I know first hand it can be hard to let go of things when you're so emotionally invested in them but I think the key is to work with your emotions, not neglect them. In my experience surrendering is always challenging but the level of bravery needed to take the step towards surrender increases when what you have to release is a person. And it's even harder to do it when the emotions you're feeling are anger and love. Now if its anger than keeps you linked to that person the awesome news is this to me is the easiest of the two! In this case it's all about loving yourself and seeing how holding on to that anger affects you negatively. Anger and grudges can consume you and start to eat you up from the inside. Remember every second spent in anger is a potential second of happiness wasted

... Now if it's love that keeps you holding on I just wanna take a moment to send you a ton of love and give you a virtual hug ♥♥HUG♥♥

And I wanna just tell you that you are incredibly blessed, because you know love, and odds are you are absolutely amazing at loving others because you care so truly and deeply, and that is nothing short of a miracle, it's a gift.
Now with that being said, take a deep breath and make a conscious decision to let go of whoever it is you feel you need to release. Realize there are many ways to love. And sometimes letting go is the best and biggest act of love.
 So this week I'm making it all about surrender. I surrender my fears to the universe because I don't need or want them anymore. Surrender my dreams to the universe so they can come true, and surrender the person I love to universe because I don't know what's best for him, all I know is I want him to be happy. Today I stop swimming up stream, I'll surrender everything, out of love for myself and love for others. What do you have to surrender?

stop being so competetive!

"Stop being so competetive!" I tell myself this pretty consistantly. I find it so easy to get into a competetive mode where i'm comparing myself to others trying to size up who's smarter, more successful, more likeable, etc . Maybe it's because we live in a really competetive world or the fact I had low self esteem but I gotta say I loved competition. Mostly because I didn't feel I ever really lost (the fact that most of these competitions took place in my head probably had a lot to do with that).  I think around the holidays there's an especially strong spirit of competition and comparision going around when what we should be feeling is a strong sense of love and oneness.

Sometimes I feel the holidays are like the olympics for all the competitions we hold in our heads.
 If you're a woman going to holiday parties you're often competing (in your head) with every other woman there (your outfit just HAS to be beyond fabulous because the thought of someone looking better than you throws you into a frenzy). We run around department stores like chickens with our heads cut off trying to find the perfect gift before someone else grabs it, or spend hours brainstorming for a gift that will outshine everyone elses. We're always competing to stand out, but overlook the fact that you can't possibly stand out when you're doing the exact same thing everyone else is doing!

There is so much craziness we encourage during this time of year, and it's all because we get into this competetive mind set. We even end up rubbing off on kids because once christmas break is over they head back to school in that same competetive mindset. I remember going back to school after christmas and all the kids would talk about is who got the best gifts. They'd brag about how they got more presents than a fellow classmate. And all of this was normal for us! Even though we all knew deep down the holiday season meant more we never really acted that way because we were too caught up competeing with each other. I think that's the saddest part is even now as an adult I still see too many people caught up in that same mindset, too concerned with having the best "toys" or gifts . People often put so much emphasis on gifts and competiton during the holidays that they forget the biggest and best gift you can ever give and recieve is LOVE, and nothing can ever compete with that.

So just think about you holiday season so far...have you gotten caught up in a competetive mind set instead of focusing on love?

Finding Love and Romance

It's safe to say pretty much everyone and their mothers are out to "find" love. It's also safe to say people generally enjoy romance, and we ladies tend to have an especially soft spot for romance. If you don't believe me just look at valentines day, or the film industry for a good example. Every movie I remember watching always includes some sort of love interest and slightly romantic angle regardless of the genre. The point is we love, love! However, the problem is, we often have the wrong idea of what love really is.

Our first limiting belief is that love has to be found. We always say we want to find love when the truth is love is everywhere and it doesn't need to be found because it isn't hiding! One of the main reasons we fail to see the love surrounding us is because of limiting belief #2..People are under the misconception that romance IS love, you can't have one without the other, and they both come in the form of a relationship with a partner. When the reality is you can have true love with no romance, beautiful romance that never turns into love, and you don't need a relationship for either.


When you say the word love most people will immediately think of a romantic relationship. I mean be honest what's the first image that comes to mind when you hear the word love?

For the longest time my idea of love was the image of a girl finding her soulmate. Love included flowers, romantic dinners, lots of flattery and a feeling of intimacy with my prince charming. In my mind if the romance wasn't there then surely the love couldn't be either. But Love is so much more than flowers and flattery, and romance can be seen in so many different areas of your life. Love and romance are much more than people give it credit for, and suprisingly enough they're also readily available, all you have to do is aknowledge it. Romance can be found in spending time with a friend, in working on a creative project, in pampering yourself, etc. The possibilities are endless because the true definition of romance isn't flowers, it's a spirit, or sentiment of beauty and affection. And love... love is felt not seen, it's anything that feeds your soul and heals your wounds. We try to keep love in a box by defining it with romantic illusions of what we think it should look like but there are no limits to love, only infinite freedom.

So stop trying to "find" love and romance, and just open your eyes to the all the love and romance goodness you already have in your life!

Much ♥

Rosi

Thank you heartache

 I would love nothing more than for this to have only positive amazing entries but we all have off days every now and then. So this entry maybe isn't as positive as I'd like but it's honest.
I've been thinking a lot about relationships in my life lately, and while they've been my greatest teachers let me just say they are kicing my ass this week.
The hardest relationships are the ones you walk away from. I walked away from one, for my own good, because I decided to love me more. I wanted more than I ever thought I could ever get from him, and he wanted something I wouldn't give him. I think he wanted to save me, be the hero, have me need him but I didn't need a hero and I didn't want a savior. All I wanted was for someone to run with me. I don't want to ever be someone's missing puzzle piece, I want us each to be complete. So I walked away, and it was for the best but it doesn't make it any easier. Watching him move on it kind of hurts, mostly because it happened so fast. It took me years to walk away and I'm still struggling. I still miss him, I'll always care for him, always have love for him.
The good news is I won't make myself pretend I don't care this time around. To be honest I'm not sure I could pretend even if I tried, I'm not that good of an actress. This time I won't bury my feelings or hide my pain with rage, this time I'll just let it wash over me like a wave, and learn to be thankful for every second of it. Thankful for every time I feel those waves leave me gasping for air because at least it'll remind my lungs they like the taste of air.  I'll be thankful for every feeling of heartache because it means I'm still standing, I can still feel, and I've known love.

If you're in a similar situation just remember to take things day by day till it gets easier, and be grateful for every second until the pain is gone and there's nothing left but love. It's like detoxing...

Don't Change A Thing!

Ok so let me start by saying that I'm all about self improvement. In my mind change is actually a really good thing.. I like it, I love it, I embrace it, I say Bring on the change! BUT only when you're changing for yourself. Whenever you change it has to be for the better and it has to be for you and no one else.

I think a lot of us fall into the bad habit of changing who we are just to please others; I myself have done it a ton of times! I was never really myself around people, I just always turned into whatever it was they needed me to be. I had this issue with everyone, with guys I wanted to be their dream girl, if he liked a certain type of music that I didn't you better believe I was going to do my research and listen to his fav music! With friends if they needed someone to give them boundries, there I was in mom mode. I somehow thought that filling whatever void they had in their lives by playing a certain role was the right thing to do, I thought it meant I was a good friend. The only problem is I was being a good friend to everyone except myself. I often found myself sacrificing not only who I was but what I believed in, just so I could be "a good friend". I mean I was constantly changing and all the while never recieving the slightest bit of gratitude from anyone. The whole thing was exhausting and dare I say painful. It was awful to feel like no one really knew me.  Then one day it finally hit me, I didn't even know who I was anymore. I'd lost so much of myself in everyone elses needs and expectations of me that I barely recognized who I was. Looking back I'm grateful for that experience because every person I changed myself for taught me a valuable lesson I won't ever forget. Don't change for anyone other than yourself, not for a guy or a friend, or anyone else, because I can tell you from experience it always ends badly! You always end up feeling like you sacrificed too much and hardly got anything in return.

If there's one life lesson you should always stick to it's to always stay true to yourself. Afterall, people  may come and go but your first and longest relationship is always with yourself. So love yourself enough to stay true to who you are.
♥

My Story

 


    Once Upon a Time,
 There was a girl named Rosi, and she was amazing!... trouble is that like most young women she started to forget that. She unknowingly allowed fears and lies to take control of her life and change who she was. She'd managed to replace self love with self loathing and deep seeded insecurities. Her daily affirmations consisted of you're not pretty enough, not skinny enough, not good enough..No one sees you, No one hears you, No one cares...Always afraid to make mistakes, afraid her heart would break, afraid to love. And things went on that way for years until one day she decided she wanted her freedom back, NEEDED it back! So for the first time in a long time she chose love over fear, made up her mind to throw caution to the wind...to be reckless.  Her new affirmations became break my patterns, change my mind, and heal my heart. This time fear didn't stand a chance! she was going to rewite her story with love in order to take back her happy ending...

On this blog I'll share with you my lessons learned, and challenges encountered on my journey back to happy.
Loving recklessly  is helping me change my life and maybe it will inspire you to change yours too.
-sending you more love than you can imagine
 
Rosi ♥