single for the holidays

I know around the holiday season it can get especially hard to deal with relationship issues whether it's friends, family or romantic. It's crazy but even when being surrounded by a ton of people around the holidays we tend to feel lonelier than ever before. That loneliness is brought about by all the comparing we do...We start comparing ourselves to all those people who are in relationships (real or otherwise). Other times we get hit with nostalgia like a ton of bricks and start comparing our last relationship to our current state of singleness. Or maybe you just compare this entire holiday season to one from your past and start counting all the ways things are different this yr. Whatever it is you're comparing, the point is you're comparing! And we really shouldn't compare our past to our present. This holiday season is different, just accept it. But just because it's different doesn't mean it has to be bad . Different can be amazing and beautiful.


I speak from experience when I say that it can be hard not being in a relationship this time of year. Just yesterday I got hit with the dreaded sense of nostalgia; started thinking about a past relationship and felt myself getting so bummed out I was practically channeling the depressed donkey from winnie tthe pooh . And wanna know what I did? Stopped watching the sad romantic drama mess on my tv! It wasn't till that moment I realized just how much that kind of stuff can affect us. We get bombarded with all these images of happy couples and families and start to feel like there's something wrong with not having that right now, like there's something wrong with us. We buy into this idea that the holidays are somehow less special if you're alone. But the truth is all the happy couples in commercials, and movies are FAKE! Somehow we overlook the fact that these images that are being fed to us are fiction. Now I'm all about happy couples, I love to see them, but more often than not when you look around at couples today they're nothing like the ones in the movies. Some of the real couples aren't even happy because the only thing keeping them in the relationship is a fear of loneliness. And settlling out of fear is most definately not how I want to spend my holiday season.


Theres a lot about this time of year that can make us buy into the illusion that we're lonely. And For the record being alone does not mean you're lonley. But I get it, we all want to share our lives and love with people who will love us back with just as much intensity as we do them. That's the key to all of this though, is realizing that what you want isn't just someone to kiss under the mistletoe or on new years. What you want is way better, because you deserve way better. Now is not the time to settle for less than you deserve, that would be the worst gift you could everrr give yourself. So this holiday season forget your ex, forget about how your friends are all coupled up, forget about anything and anyone that brings you down because this is meant to be a time of celebration! The holidays are meant to be a celebration of Love and you my darling ARE LOVE. So get out of your funk and celebrate you and all your awesomeness! you deserve it!